fatfat here(:

2011-04-26T10:30:00.000-07:00

its 17th days already.

everything seems to be much better than it use to be.

the anger, sadness and disappointment are starting to fade away.

but still, i miss you too.

last time, i always meet you, spent time with you to pass time.

now, lion dance seems to kept me busy.

in fact, its making me never wanna go find a job.

but yeah, time pass fast.

letting me forget about the past.

2011-04-13T14:59:00.000-07:00

It's been six days already.

Many things is still kept in my mind.

There are so many question that i wanna ask, that i wanna know.

That day, i never had thought that you would text me.

At that moment, i was shocked.

I don't know should i be happy or sad.

I don't know should i reply or not.

But end up i reply.

I try to forget everything and reply, fake a smile to reply.

Act like nothing has happen before. Act like my feelings are gone.

I pretend like how i treated my other friends, the bad talks and stuff.

But after we ended our conversation, a sudden sadness will rise up to my mind.

I will always tell myself, why am i doing this, does it help or not.

I told myself to stay strong and not think too much.

But the fact kept coming.

I broke down again, thinking why are you doing this to me.

The text, the concern, the respect.

Jie once told me, you have not let me go.

The meetings and stuff, its impossible that what happen now is true.

And all i said is, it's happening.

I told myself that 1month i will change things right.

I think i am just giving myself hope.

I gave up on that promise, as i know that won't happen.

You are happily with him, and just disappointment with me.

Maybe what you said is true, we don't suit each other.

But my love for you will never change.

I want you to be happy, but i will definitely be sad.

So be it, i shall suffer to let you have your happiness.

All i wanted, was to be with you. And now, chances are so slim, that i never will expect it to happen. My love for you will always be the same. I will quietly loving you, hoping you would be happy than before.

2011-04-11T19:19:00.000-07:00

It's been three days already.

The days without you is horrible.

I will think of you every once in awhile.

Think of us, think of what are you doing, think of what are you two doing happily.

Sometimes it will be so heartbreaking that i may wanna tear.

But i told myself to be strong, not to fall.

I kept trying to do things to keep me accompany and busy.

But still, it's hard. Though i tried very hard.

I wanna remain as friend, as i could do most.

But i have no courage to text you.

I always text the SMS finish, but save it in draft.

I think i am very stubborn, but ya.

It's hard faking a smile in front of you, fake a happy me in front of you.

And i don't want to show you any sadness in me, not even a little at all.

my love for you will never fade. I will wait, no matter how long, no matter how much it takes.